Very few things in my young life had the power to finish the joy in my heart than my Mum uttering the words ‘alikel’eluke inwele zika Nhlanhla!’ (Someone plait Nhlanhla’s hair!) Why? Because of the resentment it caused in every plaiting age female member of the family to whom the words were directed. None wanted to be the plaiting age female within hearing when these words were uttered. Because we know it will involve a LOT more than just plaiting. 1. Undoing the old plaits. This is when the muttering under the breath starts as your head is pushed every which way as the wool is unravelled. Things are worse if you’ve previously complained about the service provided by the Plaiter. Whiplash is common. 2. The prayer by both parties that the scalp is somehow moisturised despite the owner of the scalp gallivanting in the African dust under the drying sun and doing very little to maintain the hair between plaitings. 3. The actual ‘scratching’ when dry scalp is detected. Not IF. WHEN. (Refer to the post about ‘scratching’ for detail). 4. The vigorous brushing off of the dry flakes on the hair before it is washed. Usually with the green Sunlight laundry soap. Not the blue one that fell apart at the sight of water, and not Lifebuoy because the smell of that lingered and although they didn’t want to waste money on shampoo, your Mum didn’t want people to be able to SMELL how cheap she was being! 5. The muttering moves on to kissing teeth and other choice expressions of exasperation because they may have to now stop for the disposal of the soap ‘ends’ in a tin can so that they can be reused once they melt into each other. This is important because if Mum was to spot you throwing a soap end away your plaiting would be paused to facilitate a telling off to go with the hiding. 6. Then there is the rough drying of the hair with the DRIEST towel to be found on the line, followed by the application of your Vaseline of choice. They were ALL called Vaseline even the one from Botswana that melted too quickly. 7. And finally the use of the tail comb to draw blood lines along the scalp whilst parting it into the required pattern. More Vaseline is used to stem the bleeding as well as to moisturise the scalp but TOO much will attract the aforementioned African dust. Quite often, the wool is SO tight it causes bumps to become raised where the hair is being pulled out of the scalp. This is cured with Vaseline. 8. The owner of the head is then sent to Mum to inspect/comment on the hairstyle. Tears MUST be of joy at the good work and profuse thanks must be offered to the Plaiter who will roll their eyes at you and walk away. The telling off of the owner of the head to be plaited for being an inconvenience continues for the duration of the plaiting and is often punctuated with comb slaps to the head if the one being plaited does not respond to instructions to turn in a speedy enough fashion. Any complaints are cautiously made to avoid antagonising the Plaiter. All you can look forward to is the day you can do your own hair so as to avoid the wrath of others as well as the head and neck aches that result from each plaiting. Until that glorious day, Vaseline cures all.
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April 2016
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